Up and out!

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Hello...
Helloooooooooooooooooooooo...
I didn't expect anybody to be here anyways, but if you are, this is where you should check:
TheCairoCalls

Thank you, and bye!

Funny!

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I really respect Americans today.

For 6 years we had people trying to be more royal than the king, trying to justify every action the US does, only to be left out by Americans who realized today that things have been going in the wrong way for a long time.

Wow!

America: respect!

And…so long, suckers!!

Stupid!

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During a Seinfeld show, Jerry goes to a priest to complain that a member of the priest's church converted from Christianity to Judaism just to tell jokes about Jews. The priest asks "and does this offend you as a Jew?" to which Jerry answers "no! It offends me as a comedian!"

That's pretty much how I feel toward our government. The government actions offend me as a Machiavellian, not only as a citizen.
Take for example the recent Student Unions' fiasco. The security forces (working on auto pilot apparently) had taken students off the ballots of student unions' elections. Just like that. Violence erupted everywhere, and now they can't contain it (not without the usual excursions of Amn Markazy soldiers). The government is blaming the Muslim Brotherhood for the violence, and the Brotherhood (sounds like something straight out of medieval, huh?) is, as usual, playing the victim. It is repetitive. And it is tiring.
So, here is an idea for our cute government officials: Take your hand off the student unions. And while at it, give them some real power to question professors, and university officials about the quality of the education they are receiving.

Of course you may dismiss these suggestions as liberal, or even, God forbid, progressive. But no…we Machiavellians don’t think like that. Let’s face it: those hacks won’t be able to fix something which the NDP great minds weren’t able to even dent forward (education), so no fear there. They might actually get on the back of some loud university professors who (sometimes) demand such things as education reform, and freedom of academic expression, blah, blah, blah…What’s more important is that they will be dismissed as jokes by other students who won’t bother to go vote for them, (or anybody for that matter) come next elections. So you see, there will be zero political participation in the long run, or as NDP papas would call “a step forward”

Q.E.D.

A Chance for A Good Contractor To Be A National Hero

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It's Jimmy day!
Here's something I'm losing sleep on: Why haven't Jimmy and Diga tie the knot just yet?!
I know those marriage preparations take like forever. But come on, I'm sure this guy could pull some strings.
OR...
She is still trying to know him better. That makes sense. She must be sure who is it she is supposed to spend the rest of her life with. Fair enough.
I'd like to be a fly on one of their dates
Diga: So, are you planning to run for presidency Jimmy?
Jim: I have no intention of doing that. I repeat, No, I don't intend to run at all, all I want to do is to focus at doing a good job in my current position

That should be a good way to kick start an honest relationship!

Constitutional Amendments Anybody? No?

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Oh, I really miss little Jimmy.
You know what? With all the talk about changing article 76-again!- one begins to wonder which wall to bang his head to when it is time for him to swear to "uphold the Republican system"!
So, here is a little business opportunity: Be ready with 10000 poster sized, confidently-smiling-I'm-the-big-honcho portraits of the leader of our new "crossing". They could be in demand to fill the government offices and adorn our public spaces any of those days now.
Any of those ..... days!

At Least He is Consistent

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You can't make this stuff up, seriously!
Mubarak is urging Putin to stay for a third term. Screw the constitution, what do you know!

"Is your constitutional two-term limit an imitation of the Americans?" he was quoted by the newspaper as saying. "You criticize the Americans and you imitate what they do. Are you opening the doors or closing them? You must decide."

Well, ehh..I don't know. What do you think!

Another pearl of wisdom:

"He knows well the situation in Russia and the world," Mubarak said about Putin. "He understands everything. Let him stay."

The man is officially a farce now!
But...look at the bright side. Now we aren't only a country forced to accept a perpetual ruler...we're spreading the message!
Lead on!

So?

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2 months and 6 days after my last post, nothing had changed!
2 computers crashed, my header banner is gone, some bloggers are talking aimlessly to themselves, others are already writing their memoirs. But, I don't want to be a whiny bastards. The place is full of them already.
When I don't find something good to read, I write. I guess.
So here goes!

Kifaya: Aeh Ely Be7sal?!

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Anybody noticed this?
The website of Kifaya now has a "new foundational" manifesto!! The manifesto on its site is dated August 21st 2006! And is emphasizing opposing the US and Israel as its primary goal! Without debating the validity of this goal, what does that has to do with your primary reason, Kifaya?! Did Mubarak resign from office, and I didn't know? Did we have democratic elections? Was the press freed?!
Sophomoric is written all over you, Kifaya. And in case you don't understand this, it means childish. And if you don't, then let me put it this way: Kifaya le3b 3yal!

Kifaya: Kifaya!!!

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Let me first say that I couldn't agree more with Kifaya and its proponents on the founding principles of the movement: uniting all the different Egyptian forces in a bid to put an end to this regime and its monopoly of power. Fair enough.
But this movement had repeatedly shown that they, like the forces they oppose, are suffering from an extreme case of political bankruptcy. Rather than focusing its efforts on this one (gigantic) undertaking, they're being repeatedly sidetracked into other topics (boycotting ART for encoding world cup games for example!) which shows both a severe miscoordination and leadership absence on one hand, and a sophomoric craving to tickle people's emotions on the other.
Of course, the ready answer to those questions is always: it's all connected. Well...no, it's not, and even if it was, why divert people attention, cause more rifts between supporters, and cast a doubt on your political seriousness?. That's of course unless Kifaya thinks that all Egyptians have one opinion on everything. At which case, they will be no better than the current government...wala aeh?
The latest Kifaya fiasco is this. They're petitioning for the cancellation of the Camp David Peace Treaty. These people are just dying for public support, aren't they?
But even if we tried to look at their proposal in a rational way, I find no grounds whatsoever to support it. I know that it is a common past time for Egyptian "intellectuals" to speak how this treaty is unjust to Egypt, how it is destroying the country, and how it is all in Israel's favor (read the comments on Kifaya statements to get an idea). Strangely enough that's the same as what these people think. But...oh...they're saying that it's all in Egypt's favor and that Israel is the bigger loser...what do you know, those devious Jews! (side note: they are also saying that 1973 was a big blow to Israel...I hate to admit it, but some Israelis are more fair than our Arab "brothers").
The real problem I see is that people don't read. We seem to have a natural aversion to this basic skill. Nobody who is attacking it, had read the treaty.
The terms of the treaty are pretty straightforward about the withdrawal of the Israeli troops from Sinai. Yeah, it places some limitations on the numbers of Egyptian troops in Sinai, AND Israeli troops on the other side of the border. Plus, contrary to common belief (among supporters and opponents), the Egyptian armed forces is not denied access to the whole of Sinai, but rather the strip of land adjacent to the borders, and even this changed recently, by allowing border guards to control the borders after Israeli "withdrawal" from Gaza. And even if some of these limitations seem too much for some people, let me just tell you: there is nothing like a free launch. We screwed up in 1967, and that's the price we had to pay. Thank God we had brave people who were able to turn things around in 1973, and force Israel to sign this withdrawal treaty, because that's what is this really is. All the niceties in this treaty (political, economic, and cultural relations) are including in such a non-binding language, that it could be practically saying "it would be nice to have...". Well, it would be nice, but we're free to do whatever we want.
Of course some people respond by saying such things as "this treaty allows Israel to shoot our border guards every couple of days". What does the treaty has to do with this?!? The fact that we're turning into a mosquito country is the real reason. Let me here emphasize that the fact that I think the treaty is OK, doesn't mean that I think that we're handling ourselves well with Israel. In fact there is nothing in the treaty that says we shouldn't respond to such a violations like shooting at our border troops (and FYI: we do respond!). There is nothing which says that we shouldn't have any sort of sanctions against Israel if they're acting in a way which is harming our national interests, or is barbaric against another Arab country. The treaty has a clause against trade sanctions? so what? The GATT has that, and the US do it all the time.
What we lack is an empowered system that can stand up for the interests of its people, and its allies. Treaty, or no treaty.
And Kifaya: grow up!

Treaty text: Egyptian Ministry of Foreign Affairs
Treaty text: Israeli Ministry of Foreign Affairs

I &hearts The Arabist

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**Warning: Snap judgmet to follow**
I LOVE tha Arabist. Really. I think it is the most thought-out "Middle Eastern" blog around.
Check this great video they uploaded from the Daily Show (another favorite), this prophecy for the end of the world, and this hot new service they discoverd.
These people are good.

Seriously!

The Black Cabs Conspiracy

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Riding on the wave of my newly-found soft spot for conspiracy theories, I think I had uncovered a very intriguing mystery.
First, some background. I'm one of the unfortunate souls that have to drive o work and back for 3 hours everyday. I drive across Cairo (6th of October) and sometimes around (Ring road). Being a true Cairene, being stuck in traffic is a second nature, hell, it is even a skill; show me an abandoned city, and we will gladly have traffic there, and get stuck in it. It's what we do. My point is: it comes as no surprise for me that traffic is really bad at certain bottlenecks, and better (slightly better) at others.
What is suspicious though, is that once I passed one of those "bottlenecks", and tried to find the reason for the very slow traffic there, I couldn't find any. Only after I really paid attention that I found that the reason for these traffic jams is invariably an old black cab. The black cab's engine is always fuming, its drivers is always dark with whitening hair, his face is always dusty, he is always carrying a water container, and the water container is always red!
Does that sound like a coincidence?!
I think not.
Here is what I think:
I think that this is a part of a plot to decrease the productivity of Egyptians. Being the upbeat, work bees that we are, our angry, self loathing "enemies" had to resort to this lame tactic (hey, we uncovered it) in order to hold us back from being at our work places on time, where we could have produced the greatest technologies man had ever made, the weapons of tomorrow, and the equipment that will take us to the most distant galaxies in space. Instead, we produce biscuits, and ice cream.
Those @#$#@# bastards. We're on to you!! We're on to you!!! Bring it on!!!!!

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