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Wednesday, August 23, 2006

The Black Cabs Conspiracy

Moved on! Check TheCairoCalls

Riding on the wave of my newly-found soft spot for conspiracy theories, I think I had uncovered a very intriguing mystery.
First, some background. I'm one of the unfortunate souls that have to drive o work and back for 3 hours everyday. I drive across Cairo (6th of October) and sometimes around (Ring road). Being a true Cairene, being stuck in traffic is a second nature, hell, it is even a skill; show me an abandoned city, and we will gladly have traffic there, and get stuck in it. It's what we do. My point is: it comes as no surprise for me that traffic is really bad at certain bottlenecks, and better (slightly better) at others.
What is suspicious though, is that once I passed one of those "bottlenecks", and tried to find the reason for the very slow traffic there, I couldn't find any. Only after I really paid attention that I found that the reason for these traffic jams is invariably an old black cab. The black cab's engine is always fuming, its drivers is always dark with whitening hair, his face is always dusty, he is always carrying a water container, and the water container is always red!
Does that sound like a coincidence?!
I think not.
Here is what I think:
I think that this is a part of a plot to decrease the productivity of Egyptians. Being the upbeat, work bees that we are, our angry, self loathing "enemies" had to resort to this lame tactic (hey, we uncovered it) in order to hold us back from being at our work places on time, where we could have produced the greatest technologies man had ever made, the weapons of tomorrow, and the equipment that will take us to the most distant galaxies in space. Instead, we produce biscuits, and ice cream.
Those @#$#@# bastards. We're on to you!! We're on to you!!! Bring it on!!!!!

Also on The Egyptian

Moved on!

5 Comments:

i have a question related to the above " theory" didn't you see that all these cars are very old ( more than 20-30 years at least )... and are INCREASING in nomber... where the hill do they found these cars...try to find the hole through which they pass these cars in..this may help to uncover the hidden enemy !!!!!!

By Anonymous dermact, at August 23, 2006 12:06 PM  

Ahh the trusty decrepit old black cab. I haven’t noticed that they all carry red water bottles, but I definitely think you're onto something. Talk of this no more or they'll come and get you. I don't know who they are yet, but I wouldn’t take any chances.

By Blogger La Gitana, at August 23, 2006 12:13 PM  

C'mon..u haven't seen the red jerkin? How come?! It's a symbol!

By Blogger Tomanbay, at August 23, 2006 12:21 PM  

I can honestly say I have not seen the red jerkin (which sounds so wrong when you try to pronounce it in English). I've seen the 100 year old Baraka bottle. Does that count?

By Blogger La Gitana, at August 23, 2006 6:58 PM  

I confim the sightings of the Baraka Bottle.

By Blogger Faisal, at September 23, 2006 2:41 PM  

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